Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
