my mouth tastes like poor choices
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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