I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
