she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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