I think I died a long time ago.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
