If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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