I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
