sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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