grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Randomize
