I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
