I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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