I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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