Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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