we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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