My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
This toilet bowl is my home.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
