we're blogging at a bar
Just cropdusted the office
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
