dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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