I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
We left the knife in your bed.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
