I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
the condom got lost in my hair
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
