why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
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He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
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Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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