I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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