How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize