If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
