Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
