i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
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I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
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Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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