im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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