i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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