dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize