good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
