dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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