a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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