i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
