She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
