it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
