worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
a search helicopter?!
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
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