no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
