So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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