I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
