would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Do vagina's smell?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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