I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
