Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
