Are we in a gay sports bar?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
