I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
