Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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