And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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