the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
