Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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