You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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