i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
