I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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