he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
